Simply because he talks in a negative way about his marriage doesn't mean that his obligations to his wife are any less important to him. No matter how much you may want to walk in the sunshine with him and have him openly acknowledge his love for you, it won't happen. Planning to be together becomes a fascinating game and is thrilling to say the least.Whether or not they have children is a moot point; he will always feel as if he has to be a husband to her and take care of the marriage, whether he truly loves her or not. While he is more than willing to be your lover and to bring you gifts, he is not about to have you meet his friends and risk having his family find out about you. No matter how nice a guy he is, you are a temporary diversion for him. Stealing hours from work or home to have sex is exciting, and you may mistake his libido-driven passion for undying love. The game soon becomes a chore for him, and romantic interludes are just one more thing he "has to do." 4. Less than 5 percent of men leave their wives for the woman with whom they are having an affair.
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Her close circle of friends might know about her affair, but she really cannot let anyone else, such as colleagues or her family, know.
She is alone most of the time and spends it waiting: waiting for her married lover to call, to come meet her, to share some precious time together.
Perhaps the best advice you can give someone about having a relationship with a married man is telling her not to even start. As my friend Jenna* told me, "You can't help who you fall in love with.
The love of your life just might be a married man." Being part of any couple can be challenging and unpredictable, as we all know.Let your friends know that you still want to go out with them regularly.Don't always be so ready to cancel plans you have made with others to accommodate him. It allows you to see yourself through the eyes of another man who finds you interesting and attractive. It helps to remember that the man with whom you are intimately involved in "your other life" is not living as a monk with his wife.He knows that holding on to emotions that can only cause problems for his family is something he cannot and will not do. To safeguard yourself from too much emotional pain, you need to understand that he can only be a small part of your life and will never be more than that no matter how many promises are made.You need to have a life that works and that is full enough to withstand the pain of the eventual breakup. A solid circle of friends and a social life separate from your hidden life with him is a necessity.Your own survival is crucial, and if you do happen to fall in love with a married man, there are several hard truths you need to know. The needs of the many (namely, his family) will always outweigh your needs.